Barely three weeks ago I received a distressing call from my friend in New Jersey. Her husband, our friend who emigrated to America 24 years ago was in hospital having been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer; we immediately arranged flights but Graham was so ill he wanted to spare us from seeing him until he recovered somewhat.
A week later Graham asked to see us and we flew out the following day. We arrived in New York in a snow storm and went straight to Graham’s home having arranged to see him the next day; sadly we never saw Graham again, he passed away 3am their time. Graham had his wish, he had us there, and we did not witness his terrible death.
Our friend Graham Turpin was 51 with a zest for life that every body recognised. Graham worked in the advertising industry and one of his first jobs here in England was with Saatchi & Saatchi. He ended his career as director of print production at Merkley & Partners; the fact that around 300 people attended his service in the morning was a tribute to how highly he was thought of by his friends and work colleagues.
Only four months before he’d rode his motorbike with friends, including my son, down to Daytona and back; it is unbelievable for him no longer to be in our lives. Only weeks ago he’d been in the Virgin Isles enjoying a holiday with his wife and son, he’d just got back from a business trip to China. Despite this the period from diagnosis to death was 27 days.
In England and New York he was a life-long Millwall supporter, he flew over to see them play Manchester United in Cardiff, Graham’s den had his Millwall scarf hung on the wall next to his photograph of the team and his England scarf.
Pancreatic cancer is unforgiving and the survival rate is less than 5% after five years. Detection early is paramount and it depends where the tumour is to those signs being more apparent. Graham, after riding back from Daytona said he’d had a back-ache which had been put down to the long hard ride; this was probably the first sign of this terrible disease.
Graham’s wife Jo set up a fund in Graham’s name for research to help others facing this terrible disease. Today I read that Patrick Swayze is suffering from the same illness, I would like though to wish him and his family the strength to fight this and hope that he will be one of the lucky ones. Meanwhile I am considering how I can help raise money here in this country to bring a cure here a step closer, and if not a cure the sort of remission that will allow dignity in death!